An Ohio court ruled yesterday that a custody arrangement between two lesbian parents is valid despite the state’s constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage. The couple had signed a court-approved joint custody agreement, and then split. One of the women refused to let the other have contact with their son, and claimed their agreement was invalid under the state’s same-sex marriage ban.
This is yet another case of one lesbian mom using anti-LGBT laws to try and gain custody. Janet and Lisa Miller-Jenkins have been in the news over their custody fight, which also involves a battle between the jurisdictions of Vermont and Virginia. The couple had entered into a Vermont civil union. When they split, Lisa moved to Virginia and refused Janet any visitation rights. She sought the aid of various “ex-gay” groups, and is represented by the conservative Liberty Council. (I covered the latest in the case in last week’s Political Roundup.) An attorney for Lambda Legal says the matter could end up before the U. S. Supreme Court.
I am incensed when I read stories of LGBT parents using anti-LGBT laws to try and gain custody. Yes, there’s a parental urge to protect one’s children at all costs when they are threatened. Unless one parent is abusive or negligent, however (in which case other laws apply), is the need for protection so great that a parents are willing to abandon their sense of self and moral core to get it? What kind of example will that be for their children when they are older?
If nothing else, cases like this are why we need recognition of same-sex relationships, preferably marriage. There are already numerous laws and precedents to cover child custody cases when the parents are in a marital relationship. Divorce and separation are never easy on children, but it’s ultimately to their benefit when the legal proceedings go quickly and smoothly.
(Thanks to Pam for the Ohio link.)
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This doesn’t mean equality, though: the bio-mom’s attorney has argued “biological parents must have the ability to sever both their own and their child’s relationships with those they have chosen not to marry and who have not adopted their child.”
I read this and have to wonder if they have thought through all of the ramifications of this argument. If the courts approve this, what might the fate be of children born to heterosexual couples who had not been married? This can very easily become a weapon for anyone to use to punish their ex-partner. I think this is a disaster in the making.