Always on the lookout for lesbian moms on TV, I’ve been disappointed that Portia De Rossi’s character on Nip/Tuck seems to have vanished now that her love interest has gone back to dating one of the main male characters. Still, previews indicate the character’s daughter Eden will be in future episodes, so maybe we’ll see Portia again as well.
Eden is in fact a rarity: not only is she an adult daughter of a lesbian mom (as opposed to the usual infants and toddlers the networks give us), but she’s not a very nice person. Now, that may at first glance not bode well for those of us wanting to prove that LGBT parents are as good as any others. The fact is, however, we’re as good as any others, but also just as fallible. (Well, maybe we’re a little bit better. Recent research indicates same-sex couples show greater flexibility about gender roles and more equal division of parenting and household tasks.) Many children of LGBT parents feel pressure to be perfect in order not to reflect badly on their parents, and thus on the LGBT community as a whole, as Abigail Garner documents in her book, Families Like Mine. In a way, it means we’ve reached a certain stage of acceptance when children of LGBT parents can be shown with all the virtues—and all the flaws—of anyone else.
Nip/Tuck wasn’t content with a single example of lesbian parenting, however. In a separate storyline, lesbian mom Rosie O’Donnell plays Dawn Budge, a straight character married to a man who is secretly gay. For reasons I won’t go into here, the couple ends up at a Pride Parade, where Budge gets accidentally hit by a dyke on a bike. The confrontational Budge wants to sue. Turns out the biker has a daughter who just got accepted into Yale. If Budge sues, the woman won’t be able to send her daughter to college. Two things of note here: Nip/Tuck has now shown not one, but two adult (or almost-adult) children of lesbian moms. They have also shown perhaps the only mainstream example of a lesbian mom who doesn’t fit an ultra-feminine, straight-appearing stereotype. Yes, one can be a dyke on a bike and also a mom—and one with a daughter who gets into Yale. (Yale, I should note, is the alma mater of lesbian moms Sara Gilbert and Jodie Foster (though I use the label cautiously with Foster, as she has never used it herself), as well as Jennifer Beals, who isn’t a lesbian mom but plays one on TV.)
How can a show about two straight, male, philandering plastic surgeons be one of the most groundbreaking in its portrayal of lesbian moms? Maybe it’s the balance of the thing. A show about lesbian moms per se would still rile the masses. Put on a coating of rampant heterosexuality, though, and the positive images of the LGBT community are easier to swallow. Yes, I wish it weren’t necessary. For the moment, though, I’ll be tuning in to FX on Tuesday nights.