The New York Times just published an article about J. Shia, owner of a vintage motorcycle repair shop in Boston. If you recognize her name, that might be because this motorcycle builder, artist, and queer mom has also been fighting for the right to equal, legal parentage—a right that a pending bill could help ensure.
The article, “Striking a Balance Between Art and Motorcycle Maintenance,” by Brett Berk, traces her evolution from a child on a too-big bike, through college at the Massachusetts College of Art and Design (MassArt), to ownership of Madhouse Motors in Boston, “the largest vintage motorcycle restoration company in New England.” She not only repairs and restores vintage bikes, but also creates artistic but ridable motorcycle sculptures that have been shown in exhibits.
While the article is focused on her professional growth, not her parenting, it does touch on how, just before college, she took full responsibility for a child when her (now former) girlfriend was unable to care for him.
That brings us to Shia’s fight to be named a legal parent of the boy, which I’ve written about in relation to the Massachusetts Parentage Act (MPA) now before the legislature. As Shia testified to the Joint Committee on the Judiciary in November:
When I was 19, my then girlfriend gave birth to our son, a child she and I had agreed to raise together. I was his primary parent for the first four years of his life until his birth mother ended our relationship and eventually broke off all contact between us. It was heartbreaking to me and to him. Soon after, I learned my son had been removed from his mother’s home and taken into DCF [Department of Children and Families] custody. I immediately reached out to DCF, but they did not view me as a parent. My son suffered while in foster care, and it took almost two years for me to regain custody through a permanent guardianship. My son is now a wonderful, happy 12-year-old, but I know that a guardianship can be revoked…. There was no law to protect my son when our relationship was threatened, and no other child should have to go through that.
The MPA would allow Shia to be named a de facto parent (someone who has acted as a parent for a substantial time with the consent of the legal parent) with the same rights as any other parent. Massachusetts has recognized a de facto parent status since 1999, but this status currently allows only visitation, rather than the full “building blocks of stability and well-being” such as “decision making, child support, access to benefits and more,” according to the Massachusetts Parentage Act Coalition, a group of organizations and individuals advocating for the bill. (See their letter to the Judiciary Committee (PDF) in April.)
The MPA would make de facto parents equal, legal parents. It “reflects an extremely rigorous standard—higher than the current law” for determining de facto parentage, the coalition said. In fact, the requirements and proofs needed for de facto parentage status, and the explicit protections for survivors of domestic violence, make this status “the most protective and rigorous statute in New England.”
The legislation would also update the state’s outdated parentage laws to better protect children of LGBTQ parents and families formed through assisted reproduction. It clarifies who can be a parent and the many ways to establish parentage; gives married as well as unmarried couples of any gender access to Voluntary Acknowledgments of Parentage (VAPs); removes gendered language from parentage statutes; and adds protections for children born through assisted reproduction, including surrogacy. See my post from last July for more details.
The MPA must, however, be reported favorably out of committee before June 30 or be declared dead for this session. If you live in Massachusetts, please take action today to help pass the MPA, not only for J. Shia and her son but for all of the other children and families in Massachusetts who will benefit. (You can read some of their stories at the MPA website.) The MPA Coalition is asking people to:
- Read the Coalition letter to the Judiciary Committee Chairs
- Contact members of the Judiciary Committee and ask them to advance the MA Parentage Act to protect LGBTQ+ families and all children and families in Massachusetts
- Follow the MA Parentage Act Coalition on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook to share posts and help spread the word
Here’s a video with more of Shia’s story. I hope you’ll watch it and then go read the NYT article on her very cool business (and see photos of her and her family that I can’t repost here). (Bonus fun fact: The article’s author, Brett Berk, also wrote a book in 2008 called The Gay Uncle’s Guide to Parenting, which, while not specific to queer families, is nonetheless full of useful advice.)
