Back-to-School Resources for LGBTQ Parents

I first started posting back-to-school resources for LGBTQ parents in 2006, before my own son was even in school. He’s grown and changed, and so has this list. I hope it remains useful, whether your children are just entering school, starting a new school, or encountering new issues in their educational journeys.

[Update: Please see the 2016 list for the latest resources and links.]

For All Ages

Teaching Tolerance’s guide, “Best Practices: Creating an LGBT-inclusive School Climate,” is a useful compact reference for classrooms of all ages.
The Family Equality Council’s Inclusive Schools page offers sample letters that parents can send to teachers to start a conversation about LGBT inclusion; suggestions for making school forms more inclusive, and book ideas for all ages.
Schools In Transition: A Guide for Supporting Transgender Students in K-12 Schools, is a free guide aimed at helping administrators, teachers, and parents provide “safe and supportive school environments for transgender students.” Co-authored by the National Center for Lesbian Rights, Gender Spectrum, the National Education Association, the American Civil Liberties Union, and the Human Rights Campaign Foundation, it discusses basic concepts, general guidelines for meeting the needs of transgender youth, specific issues impacting them, best practices, and the legal landscape.
Gender Spectrum’s education section also has classroom discussion ideas, information about teacher training, school policy suggestions, and more related to gender identity and expression, in addition to many other useful resources for parents.
Groundspark’s Messaging Toolkit for Supporting LGBT Inclusive Curriculum and Policies is a practical, helpful guide for parents, teachers, and others who want to create more inclusive schools by reaching out constructively to others in their communities.

For Families with Young Children

The Human Rights Campaign’s Welcoming Schools site is perhaps the best single resource here, covering family diversity, gender stereotyping, and bullying. They have a section just for parents and caregivers (as well as ones for teachers and administrators), with book recommendations, ideas for building community, suggestions for productive discussions with teachers and administrators, and much more. Be sure to watch the trailer for their award-winning DVD, What Do You Know? Six- to twelve-year-olds talk about gays and lesbians.
GLSEN’s Ready, Set, Respect Toolkit is a great set of tools and lesson plans for elementary school teachers covering name-calling and bullying, family diversity, gender-role diversity, and more.

For Families with Older Children

Many resources aimed at older students focus on LGBTQ youth, but most also have applicability to children of LGBTQ parents, whatever the children’s sexual orientation or gender identity.

GLSEN again is a good resource here, with extensive safe-schools materials for both educators and students, including information on its educator training program and starting gay-straight alliances, as well as research about the impact of homophobia and transphobia.
GLSEN also manages a number of programs/events to engage school communities of all grades throughout the academic year, including Ally Week, ThinkB4YouSpeak, the Day of Silence, No Name-Calling Week, and the Safe Space Kit.
PFLAG’s Safe Schools for All: Cultivating Respect program has similar materials (in English and Spanish) for making schools safer, reducing bullying, and providing comprehensive health education. They also offer a certification program for PFLAG members who want to assist with staff training and policy creation in local schools.
The Gay-Straight Alliance Network also has great materials for starting or sustaining a GSA.

Book Recommendations

The American Library Association’s Rainbow List offers LGBTQ-inclusive children’s and young adult books chosen by a committee of librarians for quality as well as content. (See also the lists from Family Equality and Welcoming Schools mentioned above.)
You may also want to encourage your school library to purchase Jaime Campbell Naidoo’s Rainbow Family Collections, an annotated guide to nearly 250 LGBTQ-inclusive books and media for children through grade five.
Another excellent recommendation for schools, and less well-known than it should be, is Jennifer Bryan’s From the Dress-Up Corner to the Senior Prom: Navigating Gender and Sexuality Diversity in PreK-12 Schools.

Educational Films

Groundspark’s series of LGBTQ-inclusive diversity-education films and curriculum guides include That’s a Family, for elementary school students, about different family structures; Let’s Get Real, for middle schoolers, about name-calling and bullying; It’s STILL Elementary, for and about educators discussing gay issues in schools; and Straightlaced, for teens, about the pressure of gender stereotypes. The films are also available for individual screening online.

Sports-Related Resources

A 2008 GLSEN study found that some students were told they should not do sports, or had their athletic abilities questioned, because they had LGBT parents. And GLSEN’s 2011 National School Climate Survey found that “more than half of LGBT students were bullied or harassed in their P.E. class.”

GLSEN’s Changing the Game project is backed by a coalition of athletes, journalists, and sports figures. It features resources for athletes, athletic administrators, coaches, and parents, inspirational videos about people making a difference, and the Team Respect Challenge pledge.
Athlete Ally, founded by straight college wrestling coach Hudson Taylor (a former three-time NCAA Division I All-American wrestler), offers individuals an online pledge to reduce homophobia in sports, runs public awareness campaigns and educational programs, and mobilizes ally Ambassadors in collegiate, professional and Olympic sports.
The National Center for Lesbian Rights’ Sports Project has long been a powerhouse of advocacy and education. It also offers legal assistance for LGBTQ athletes and coaches.

Anti-bullying

Just published is Bullying and The Law, a free guide by attorney Adele Kimmel of Public Justice, a national impact litigation group. Kimmel describes the options parents have, including legal action, when students are bullied, and suggests things to consider when thinking about such action. She also provides information on what parents can reasonably expect from schools in those situations, and what the options are when schools don’t do enough. The guide was created for the Bully Project, an anti-bullying initiative inspired by the award-winning 2011 film Bully.
The Matthew Shepard Foundation has a number of resources for educators and others specific to anti-LGBT bullying, including Matthew’s Place, “an online village for LGBTQ youth and allies.”
Stopbullying.gov has many good general resources about bullying and cyberbullying.
The It Gets Better project continues to spread messages and videos of hope to bullied LGBTQ youth.
GLAAD organizes the annual Spirit Day (October 16 this year) as a sign of support for bullied LGBTQ youth.
Many state LGBTQ organizations’ websites also have information on state-specific anti-bullying laws.

Personally, I try to approach the new school year not in a spirit of trepidation, but one of opportunity. Our common goal as parents and teachers is to educate our children in a safe and welcoming environment. That gives us reason to unite across our differences.

I am a member of the Amazon Associates program, and get a small referral fee from all purchases made at Amazon.com via links on this site. You are under no obligation to purchase through them.