How to Make a Decision: Family Creation and Other Major Choices

I’m occasionally asked, usually by lesbian friends considering pregnancy, how my partner and I chose our sperm donor. Truth be told, we didn’t use any particular methodology other than agreeing on key factors (health above all), starting with a broad list, and refining, refining, refining. With most sperm banks, you can get free, short profiles of the donors, and pay for more extensive ones, which we did once we got the list down to where this was a reasonable financial burden. After that? Well, I seem to remember a lot of long discussions, paper sorted in piles on the floor, and hoping the cat would offer his opinion by sitting on his profile of preference. (He didn’t, which perhaps explains his indifference to the now-toddling result of our efforts.)

In today’s Lifehacker blog, however, editor Gina Trapani has written a very useful article on Four Ways to Make a Big Decision. Some of you may find it helpful if you are trying to decide on a sperm donor, choose among family creation methods, or make other important life choices. Trapani offers three mathematically-based ways of analyzing options. What I like about her approach, though, is that she knows its limits. Her fourth way of making a decision is to Trust Your Gut. Use the numbers to guide but not rule you.

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