I’ve written ad infinitum about the impact on children of Prop 8 and other anti-LGBT measures. SFGate’s “City Brights” writer and internist physican Doc Gurley, however, offers some practical advice on how to help your children cope with the emotions they may be feeling as a result of the ruling.
Here’s a summary of her main points—but definitely go read the whole thing if you’re in California or any other state with anti-LGBT measures in the news.
- Be tolerant of irritability, mood swings, anger, shame and grief.
- Frame the issue to allow for hope.
- Chart a path for the future that includes constructive acts, and and then take actual physical steps to achieve them.
- Try to protect your child from being re-traumatized.
- If you care about kids in a family that’s been affected, let your feelings be known.
Thanks for drawing our attention to this.
Wish’t I could have said more there, but that’s about all I can muster at the moment. Except: to me, this is ALL about protecting my kids. ALL of it. Or 99.99% of it. So thanks.
We rarely mention the children when debating LGBT rights with opponents of equality for all citizens and it’s a point that’s needs to be raised more often.
I believe that framing the issue to allow for hope is fundamental when talking to the kids; it’ll help them cope with the present environment, prepare for action when needed, and create a vision for when the time time finally comes; the time when we become a country of equals.
Our son is 16, so he has had a good grasp of what is going on with Prop 8. Thank goodness for our church! (Unitarian Universalist) There are other kids in the same boat in his church group. The church itself has repeatedly stated that it supports all marriages and considers Prop 8 and anything like it as deeply wrong. The maelstrom of emotions and frustrations of being a teenager compounded by the maelstrom of emotions and frustrations we’ve been going through as a family are soothed for him by having support outside the family. (He knows that 1,000 church members stand behind him, and that every UU church in the country stands behind our family.)
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