But Wait, There’s More: Latest in Miller-Jenkins Case

It’s the case that will not end. The custody battle between Lisa Miller and Janet Jenkins, has dragged on for years. Miller, the bio mom, who now says she is no longer a lesbian, most recently tried in Virginia to block enforcement of a Vermont order granting Jenkins visitation rights with their seven-year-old daughter Isabella. Tuesday, however, the Virginia Court of Appeals unanimously affirmed the decision of a lower court to throw out Miller’s attempt.

At least the courts seem to be doing the right thing, which is more than I can say for ones in Missouri or Louisiana. Still, as I’ve written before, Enough Already!

With all the hue and cry about marriage equality, which I fully support, I think there are also a whole host of separate issues related to parentage that we need to address. As I commented in an earlier post, being married in a state that permits same-sex couples to marry is not enough for a non-bio mom’s parentage to be recognized in other states, even if she is on the child’s birth certificate. If another state doesn’t recognize the marriage, it doesn’t recognize her right to be on the birth certificate, which is why lawyers recommend that non-bio moms still do second-parent adoptions when possible. Marriage may help, but our current state-by-state process means it’s not enough. We need greater state-to-state consistency in terms of parentage recognition.

If we do repeal DOMA and establish federal relationship recognition, there are still plenty of laws that recognize opposite-sex couples as parents even if they are not married. It follows that marriage (or even civil unions) should not be the only way for same-sex parents to gain recognition, either. The intent to become a parent has to take precedence over any legal registration or ceremony between the two adults. (I’m cribbing a lot from Nancy Polikoff here, who has written extensively on the subject.) Not that marriage isn’t an important right—but it won’t solve all our problems.

That’s all looking far forward, however. Back to Miller-Jenkins: Somehow I doubt we’ve heard the last of this, but for Isabella’s sake, I hope Miller stops trying to prevent her from spending time with her other mom.