In Memoriam: Ina Mae Murri and Stella Lopez-Armijo

Via the Bay Area Reporter (BAR) comes the sad news of the deaths of Ina Mae Murri, 75, and Stella Lopez-Armijo, 76, a lesbian couple from Fremont, California, who were killed in a car crash in Idaho two weeks ago. The women had been together for more than 35 years, and were mothers, grandmothers, and great-grandmothers. They were active in the LGBT community and among the original founders of Lavender Seniors of the East Bay. Each was married to a man and had children before coming out. BAR calls them “pioneers in recognition for lesbian mothers.”

In their lives, they each came up against some of the biggest institutions that oppose LGBT rights. Lopez-Armijo is Catholic; Murri is Mormon, and each has written about trying to reconcile faith with sexual orientation. Murri also enlisted in the Air Force, but was discharged for being a lesbian.

Danette Ariotti, Murri’s great-niece, has a touching personal reflection about them at the Salt Lake City Examiner, and Inside Bay Area has their funeral notice. Go read.

It is stories like theirs that make me realize how much we are indebted to those first generations of out lesbian mothers. No matter the obstacles we face today, they are less because of the courage and visibility of women like Murri and Lopez-Armijo. My condolences to their family and friends.

We see more and farther than our predecessors, not because we have keener vision or greater height, but because we are lifted up and borne aloft on their gigantic stature.

Bernard of Chartres (12th century), quoted by his student John of Salisbury

2 thoughts on “In Memoriam: Ina Mae Murri and Stella Lopez-Armijo”

  1. Thank you for such a beautiful memorial. My Moms brought so much to so many. I miss them so much, but am always reminded of their compassion, laughter, foresight and the love they gave to all of us.
    Peace, love, pass it on…

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