BlogHer Section Editor Melissa Ford (also of Stirrup Queens) recently asked me to write a piece for the BlogHer Absolute Beginners series, a two-page “Crib Sheet” (love the name) about being the LGBT parent of an infant. I hope you’ll go have a read.
One of the scariest moments of my life was bringing my son home from the hospital after he was born. My spouse and I suddenly lost all of the support we’d had from nurses and staff, and were turned loose to muddle through for the next 18 or so years. I wanted a simple, handy instruction sheet—preferably something like the ones that came with all the IKEA furniture we’d assembled in preparation for his arrival. Of course, raising children is not exactly the same as assembling furniture, but I hope my Crib Sheet may help in getting started.
Do go read some of the other entries in the Absolute Beginners series, too, covering topics such as advice for parents creating families through surrogacy, breastfeeding tips, being a single mother by choice, and teaching children about their Hispanic heritage.
Special thanks to Susan of Mama Non Grata for writing an accompanying post in response to my piece, and for sharing the story and pictures of her own family.
An ikea instruction manual for a baby!?!?! That made me laugh so hard.
You’d end up with extra pieces that you wouldn’t know what to do with. And you’d need to go online to find someone with a youtube video to help you decipher the wordless instructions. After about 4 hours of using your alan key, you’d be brought to tears because you just had a screaming match with your partner as your hand cramped up and you realized you had put your item together all wrong.At which point you want to figure out what’s the easiest way to get the item back to ikea so you can return it and upgrade to something that arrives at your doorstep fully assembled.
Best analogy ever!!! (Yeah, some IKEA stuff is a breeze, and yet there’s been times when it makes me shudder. See, once you learn to speak IKEA, it’s all good. But until then, just watch that really old episode of the Amazing Race where IKEA furniture was a challenge and you’ll see people melt down and lose it).