Parenting as a Butch

I’m always thrilled at how really, truly diverse the LGBT community is, beyond just the broad categories people tend to think of when they typically think of “diversity.” We subdivide down into a glorious array of shared identities and individuality. Two writers proved that recently by each offering a different perspective on parenting as a butch.

In A. K. Summers’ Pregnant Butch (which I reviewed at more length earlier this week), she explains her desire, as an adoptee herself, to have a biological connection with her child. This drove her decision to become pregnant — a process that made her rethink what it means to be butch.

Over at Mutha Magazine yesterday, Andrea Lawlor writes in “Why Hart Doesn’t Have Two Mommies” about being a parent who doesn’t identify “as a mother, a lesbian, or a woman at all, frankly,” but who doesn’t identify as a man, either. Lawlor notes Summers’ experience with pregnancy and states, “But that’s not me.” Variations on “Mom” didn’t work for her, but neither did “Papa.” They finally found a more fitting identity as “Baba,” as many other butch parents have done.

It’s a great read, and I encourage you to check it out, along with the many other wonderful pieces at Mutha. (For more variations on what our kids call us, take a look (and contribute to!) my long-running survey on the subject.)