A nonbiological mother is the legal parent of her daughter, the New Hampshire Supreme Court ruled last week, in yet another unfortunate instance of a biological mother trying to claim otherwise.
Susan and Melissa were a New Hampshire couple who planned to raise a family together. They bought a house, had a commitment ceremony (in 1998, before they could legally marry anywhere), found a sperm donor whose heritage matched Susan’s, and got Melissa pregnant, according to court documents. Their daughter Madelyn was born in 2002 and had Susan’s middle and last names. Both women were named as her parents in the birth announcements and medical and school records. Both participated equally in decisions regarding Madelyn’s life.
An attorney advised Susan to be appointed as the girl’s guardian since she could not legally adopt her. Melissa also changed her will to appoint Susan the guardian if Melissa died while Madelyn was a minor.
When Madelyn was six years old, however, the women split, and Melissa and their daughter moved in with Eugene, who Melissa later married. Susan and Melissa initially agreed upon a regular visitation schedule, and Susan paid child support and was involved in Madelyn’s life. Earlier this year, however, Melissa terminated Susan’s guardianship in family court, cut off her contact with Madelyn, and began proceedings for Eugene to adopt the girl. The family court dismissed Susan’s petition for a determination that she “is a legal parent to,” or “stands in loco parentis to” Madelyn, and for a child support and parenting plan.
Susan contacted GLAD, who represented her in court and helped her win back her right to be her daughter’s legal parent. The state Supreme Court said that she does have standing to seek a parentage determination, to intervene in the adoption proceedings, and to maintain her guardianship. They ordered the family court to “to schedule a prompt hearing” to reevaluate Susan’s petition.
Susan hasn’t seen Madelyn in sixteen months. Let’s hope that prompt hearing really is fast. And ladies, let’s stop trying to deny our co-parents are parents. It may suck to share custody with an ex, but ripping a child away from one parent (aside from cases of abuse, of course) is rarely in the child’s best interests.
