Lots of moving family stories in this roundup, including a family living full time in their RV; a couple who induced lactation so they could both nurse; a trans dad and his spouse who started their family with two known donors, also spouses; stories of infertility and miscarriage, and more—including penguins!
Family Profiles
- Shalene And America share with Open Road Chronicles their life living full time with two children and a dog in a 36-foot RV. They often “work camp,” taking jobs at campgrounds in return for a campsite and other benefits, and note, “Traveling and work camping with kids and not fitting into the typical bill of ‘husband’ and ‘wife’ as many ads advertise for is just something we have had to persevere through and stay confident; knowing that we won’t be what every job wants and being okay with that only motivates us to try harder to find that perfect adventure.”
- “Every Day Is Groundhog Day As a Gay Dad” writes David Kaufman at Fatherly. “Being a parent immediately thrusts you deep into the heart of the heterosexual conventionality complex,” he writes. This means he has to come out again and again. At the same time, as someone black, Jewish, and gay, he says, “Fatherhood is the first time I’ve ever ‘passed’ as absolutely regular.” I love this piece for its exploration of intersecting identities and where marginalized ones meet majority cultures.
- Glenis Liz-Decuir and her spouse Tiffany spoke with Parents magazine about inducing lactation so both of them could nurse their baby.
- Comcast Newsmakers spoke with Alicia Hinds Ward of The American Military Partner Association, who discusses the organization’s support network for LGBTQ troops and families.
- Also, I don’t think I ever shared this lovely video from last August about Heather, a cisgender woman, and Mitch, a transgender man, starting their family with known donors who are also spouses. (Also: Rice Krispie treats!)
When the Path to Parenthood Isn’t Smooth
- Kristen at Autostraddle writes a moving piece about losing a pregnancy and her marriage.
- Allegra Hirschman at Mutha magazine asks “Am I Infertile or Just Queer?” in a piece on trying to conceive while queer.
Politics and Law
- New York has just implemented a new law requiring all new and renovated buildings with public bathrooms to have changing tables in both men’s and women’s restrooms. As Bil Browning points out at LGBTQ Nation, this will particularly help gay and single fathers—and ease the burden on moms in different-sex relationships, too, I’d add.
- Same-sex couples in Ireland who use assisted reproduction will be able to have both parents’ names on their children’s birth certificates under a new law.
Media and Entertainment
- National Ambassador for Young People’s Literature and queer mom Jacqueline Woodson writes for the Children’s Book Council about her first year in the former role.
- The new Netflix comedy Sex Education includes a character with two moms. Kayla at Autostraddle opines, “Even with their little screen time, they feel like real, fully developed characters, the strains of their relationship due to their different approaches to parenting popping through.”
- Nickelodeon has featured its first real-life family with two dads, who appeared on the game show Double Dare. The network has previously shown queer characters in its animated shows The Loud House, where the best friend of the main character has two dads, and (arguably) The Legend of Korra, where the main character and a female friend hold hands and seem to be in love in the very last scene of the very last episode. The creators later said the two female characters were canonically in a relationship—but since this happened just as the show ended, I’m hesitant to call it representation.)
- Ottawa’s Catholic School Board has changed its decision to remove Drama
, a graphic novel by Raina Telgemeier, from elementary school libraries because it includes a romance between two boys. After the story of the ban broke in the media, the author, local politicians, and parents criticized the move, and the board relented.
Research
- A new study of 732 gay dads in 47 states, led by Dr. Ellen Perrin of the Floating Hospital for Children and Tufts University’s School of Medicine, found that two-thirds of gay fathers have felt the pain of social stigma, mostly at religious gatherings. They were less likely to experience this in states with more legal protections for same-sex couples. Nearly 40 percent of the children were born in a different-sex relationship (an important figure to remember when we consider who is in the universe of families with queer parents); a little over one-third came to their families through adoption or foster care; and 14 percent through surrogacy.
Penguins (Fun enough for their own category!)
- The New York Times profiles the parenting journey of Sphen and Magic, the Australian same-sex penguin pair now raising chick Sphengic. (See also my piece from last October on Sphen, Magic, and the many other same-sex penguin families.)
