Pride is a funny concept, with both positive and negative connotations. It goeth before a fall. It makes a combustible pairing with prejudice. The Marines, though few, lay claim to it. Pride can be overweening. It can blind us to the needs of others. But it can also remind us of what is important in life: our children, our families, our identities.
Today is National Coming Out Day. As I mentioned in my coming out resources post yesterday, I came out well before I became a parent. Yet even being out from Day One of parenthood doesn’t mean visibility is easy. Here are a few things my experience has taught me.
Tomorrow, the Boy Scouts of America will be voting on a new policy that would lift the ban on gay scouts, while still banning gay and lesbian leaders. It’s a step in the right direction, but still an insult to gay scouts who will never be able to become leaders, and to those who have lesbian or gay parents, as I wrote when they first proposed it. Take action today to tell the Boy Scouts to allow gay scouts and leaders.
The Boy Scouts of America have proposed a policy change that would allow gay Scouts in their ranks, but would continue to deny leadership positions to “open or avowed homosexuals.” This policy is both a step forward and a slap in the face.
The Boy Scouts of America are an anti-gay organization. They don’t allow gay scouts—even ones about to get their Eagle awards. They kick out gay dads and lesbian moms who are leading their children’s dens and troops. But not all Scout leaders agree with the national policy, and some are speaking out.
The Boy Scouts’ Lincoln Heritage Council in Kentucky kicked Assistant Scoutmaster Greg Bourke out of his son’s troop last month, just because he is gay. Bourke, who has served the Scouts for five years, writes in a petition at Change.org that he has received “unanimous support from my Troop, Troop Committee, Church, Scouts, Scout Leaders and Scout Parents.”
My son is going through a Pokémon phase, spending hours playing the collectable-card game and reading about the mythical characters. Not all myths are fun and games, however. Below is a baker’s dozen of myths about LGBT parents and our children, all harmful in various ways.
The Boy Scouts may be shining a flashlight into a tent they would prefer remains dark. In April they ejected Ohio mother Jennifer Tyrrell from her position as leader of her son’s Cub Scout den, simply because she is a lesbian. In doing so, however, they turned a light on the impact of their policy, and helped show that the real victims are children like Tyrrell’s seven-year-old.
It’s National Coming Out Day once again, so I hope you’re having a happy day no matter where you are in your coming out journey. Here’s an updated version of a piece that sums up a lot of my thoughts on coming out as an LGBT parent. It has become something of a truism in
I was recently asked by a mainstream journalist: “Are you worried about providing male role models for your son?”
I answered, as I always do to the question, “No.” It’s not that I don’t want him to have male role models; it’s just that I’m not worried about it. I think that very often, when the media asks that question, they are ignoring the realities not only of same-sex and single parents’ lives, but also of children’s lives in general.
