The number of books for and about parents of transgender kids is happily growing, and this volume by LGBTQ inclusion consultant Ben V. Greene takes its place among the best of them, not least because Greene, as a trans man himself, has both personal and professional experience with the subject at hand.
The book is actually aimed at any adult who wants to support trans youth, whether that means a child, other relative, student, patient, or trans youth in general; Greene helpfully uses the term “your VIP” to refer to the young person in question. And while Greene advises first and foremost, “Listen to your VIP,” he has written the book in large part so that trans youth are not burdened with having to educate everyone around them about trans identities and concerns. The book covers topics including the coming out process for both the VIP and the adult reader; creating a safe home environment, how to tell family members (with the VIP’s consent); protecting your VIP’s mental and emotional health; processing your own feelings; medical transition; and understanding what it is like to move as a transgender person in school, health care settings, college, the workplace, and more. Greene includes but goes beyond simple advice, such as telling readers to use the right name and pronouns for their VIPs, and also offers helpful, tactical ways to practice as well as useful analogies for thinking about many of the topics covered.
Greene infuses the entire book with a judgment-free, conversational vibe and a sense of queer joy. In fact, he includes “joy exercises” throughout the book, fun activities for practicing or implementing ways of supporting VIPs.
As a cisgender reviewer with a cisgender child, I recognize my limits in assessing this volume, but as a member of the wider audience Greene is trying to reach (adults who want to support trans youth), I found it both informative and enjoyable. Highly recommended.
