A young child explores gender identity with the help of supportive parents and friends in this fun story of growing self-awareness. Payden loves to play dress up and pretend—but also wonders about “who he really was.” One day Payden explains to mom and dad that “I’m not sure I’m a boy.” The parents say they’ll use any name Payden wants and suggest asking friends, who use different pronouns, for advice. They say they’ll throw a party after the decision.
Payden talks with friends and neighbors who have both always felt like they had the right pronouns and those who have changed them. One uses “he,” one “she, “and one “they.” Another uses “she” and “ze.” Each describes how the right pronouns can feel like flying, dancing, or getting a hug.
Payden tries them all, even dressing up in various costumes while doing so. Finally, “gender neutral pronouns personally fit best,” making Payden feel like flying, dancing, and being hugged. “I want to be called e, em, and eir,” Payden announces, and eir parents throw the promised party, with all of Payden’s friends. costumes, and of course pronoun badges.
I do wonder if promising pronoun parties in real life may make children feel pressured to settle on something rather than keep exploring, should they wish to, or may make them reluctant to change to a better fit (if they feel this necessary) once such a party has been thrown. Know your own kid and proceed accordingly—and consider whether such a party would be welcome at all or if they’d prefer a more private celebration. A party was clearly right for Payden, though, and eir story is fun and uplifting, with a great model of supportive parenting. Even kids who don’t want a pronoun party themselves might be grateful to know that they could have one, should they want to—making this a welcome book indeed.
Payden has light brown skin and brown hair.
