In this beautiful novel in verse, 11-year-old Stevie gets anxious when she doesn’t know things, like “The ocean and all the things that live there/and why it’s so scary,” or why she gets “a fizzy feeling/Warm and squishy” when she looks at her friend Chloe.
We journey with Stevie on her quest for understanding, as she attempts to be brave and learn about the things that make her anxious. Her single mum tries to be supportive, but can only do so much when Stevie is unable to express the one thing—her crush on Chloe—that is puzzling Stevie the most. Stevie, for her part, doesn’t want to add to her mum’s own worries.
Stevie does what so many young queer people do, and searches for answers online, then in a library. A helpful librarian is a key figure here. (While that is something of a spoiler, I mention it because it highlights the vital role of LGBTQ-inclusive books for young people even as those books remain among those most likely to be challenged and targeted for removal or restriction.)
Author Meg Grehan skillfully uses short, spare lines and repetition to capture Stevie’s feelings and views of the world. The rhythm of the lines pulls readers along and makes for a fast read, but the emotions and observations packed into each line will likely mean many re-readings of this perceptive story of coming out and beginning to grow up.
Originally published in Ireland by Little Island Books in 2019.
