Award-winning author Andrew Larsen and his grown son, musician Bells Larsen, here give us a tender story about a nonbinary child and their father, inspired by Bells’s own experience as a transgender person.
In the book, a child and their father are building their annual ice rink together. Something feels different this year, though. “Do you ever feel mixed up about who you are?” the child asks. “Did you always know who you wanted to be?” The father tries to be supportive, but his answers to these questions come from his own experience, which doesn’t get at what the child is really asking about.
The child persists, however, and eventually explains, “I look like a boy but sometimes I feel more like a girl.” The dad offers unconditional support, saying, “I’m glad you told me.”
Later, the child adds that, “My name feels like an itchy sweater,” and says they want to change it to “Gray.” The father says that’s a big change, but that he will try to use the new name. He stumbles once, calling Gray “buddy,” but is thankful for a reminder from Gray.
They skate together on the new rink, round and round. At the end of the evening, the father uses their new name, which feels warm and right, like the hot chocolate they always share after the first skate of the season.
I absolutely love how this book balances Gray’s changing identity against the unchanging aspects of their father’s love and their family traditions. I also appreciate that it is a father we see providing the support here; many kids’ books about trans and nonbinary children focus more on the mother, and I think it is important to show paternal support as well. The first-person perspective centers Gray’s experience, and the Larsens are accomplished enough not to over-explain, so that the story feels personal rather than pedagogical. A few asides by Gray also show how their peers are starting to divide themselves by gender, neatly conveying some of what Gray may be processing as they seek to define themself.
Tallulah Fontaine’s illustrations reflect the gentle tone of the text and the winter setting. All told, this is a standout book and highly recommended.
The text does not use pronouns for Gray; the publisher’s blurb uses they/them, so I have followed that. Gray and his father are White.
