Parents, says gynecologist and author Charis Chambers, “are a critical influence on their child’s sexual and reproductive health.” Parents’ attitudes around menstruation strongly impact the experiences of their children who menstruate—so if parents think of menstruation as something dirty, embarrassing, or to be endured regardless of the pain, their children are likely to do so as well. And health education in school has become mired in controversy and limited by politics, with topics often not discussed until far too late for many students.
In this book that is fully inclusive of all people who menstruate, Chambers proposes another way: a “parent-led revolution.” Parents or guardians, she says, should give children a reproductive health education that honors who they are, is grounded in an understanding of puberty and periods (which provide the fundamentals of sex education), is free of shame and stigma, and instead leans into “acceptance, understanding, agency, and power.”
Using examples from her own patients (with pseudonyms) and her own medical expertise, Chambers debunks myths about periods (e.g., they are dirty, or tampon use leads to sexual activity), and offers instead tested advice and clear, accurate physiological information (with some details that may be new even to those who know basically what’s going on). There is advice about how to approach these topics with our children at different ages and to support their emotional growth as well.
Chambers also looks at how parents can examine and dismantle any negative associations about puberty or periods that we may have carried over from their own childhoods, and how we can overcome our own fears as parents (e.g., about our children growing up, or how to start conversations on these topics). Her scope is wide, since she sees period education and sex education as part of the same spectrum of reproductive health education (although her emphasis is on menstruation more than sexual activity), and she also tackles topics like body autonomy and safety. There are practical tips, too, from conversation-starting questions to ideas for what to put in “period kits” customized for each child’s needs.
She discusses, too, how racial and socioeconomic disparities impact reproductive health and access to information and resources, and how parental influence and family acceptance is particularly important for sexual- and gender-minority youth. Throughout, too, the book uses gender-inclusive language, such as “people with periods” and “menstruators.”
Read this book if you struggle in any way with approaching the topic of puberty or periods with your children. Read it if you don’t struggle but just have a few questions, want to make sure you’re doing all you can, or simply want a little extra support yourself as you find the balance between protecting your child and trusting them as they grow. Read it so that you can recommend it to others or so that you can put into words why such education is critical to the well-being of the next generation.
“It is time for parents to do what no one else can: protect and preserve the reproductive freedom of the next generation,” Chambers says. This highly recommended title is both a manifesto and a guidebook to help do just that.
