One of the most common questions I hear from other LGBTQ parents is “Where can I find all-gender-inclusive children’s books about bodies and reproduction?” This colorful board book does so with age-appropriate yet accurate answers for children 3 1/2 years and up. While a few parts could be more inclusive, this book takes a step in the right direction and may still have value for some LGBTQ (and other) families.
It begins with a simple look at parts “on the inside” and “on the outside,” and notes that there are some parts “that people learn to think of as private,” which we usually keep covered. This is accompanied by two images of nude people, one with a vulva and the other with a penis. Neither is gendered.
The next page explains more about genitals, “body parts that grownups need to make a new person. Various inside and outside parts of the genitals are labeled, with some simplification for younger readers—the Fallopian tube is labeled “Egg tube” and the vas deferens is the “Sperm tube.” These labels still seem functionally accurate and not simply made-up euphemisms.
We then learn about eggs and sperm and how they must join to make a new person. Most often, the book tells us, this happens because a vagina and a penis “are just the right size and shape to fit together.” Furthermore, “Grownups enjoy bringing their bodies close in this way. It also gives them pleasure.” On the next page, though, we learn that sometimes a doctor helps bring egg and sperm together “inside or outside the body.”
Let’s dissect all that a bit. I appreciate the sex-positive approach that notes the pleasurable aspect of sex. However: Saying “Grownups enjoy” excludes asexual identities, not to mention those of us with same-sex attractions who enjoy bringing our bodies close, but not “in this way” (that brings egg and sperm together). At the very least, a phrasing like “Many grownups enjoy” would have left a little room for people with these identities.
I also wish the book gave a little more explanation about why and when a doctor might need to help, by saying something such as, “If grownups don’t have both sperm and eggs, or if their sperm and eggs aren’t connecting, sometimes a doctor helps….”
The next few pages take us through pregnancy, fetal development, and birth. The book explains vaginal birth but also notes that some babies “come out in a different way” with a doctor’s help. That’s short on detail, but still leaves room for parents to fill in about C-sections as desired. The text happily doesn’t gender pregnant people.
The last few pages discuss what babies need—food, comfort, attention, sleep, and mostly, love. The final page shows several different families, with a mom and a dad, two moms, two dads, and a single dad.
I appreciate the inclusive language used in this book. The images of people who are pregnant or nursing, however, are only of people who read as women. That’s what most children will encounter, certainly, but offers no representation for trans men or nonbinary people who may be pregnant/nursing. Contrast Cory Silverberg and Fiona Smyth’s What Makes a Baby, whose images are less gendered. What Makes a Baby also offers more detail about C-sections, noting that sometimes doctors “make a special opening below the belly button” and showing a (bloodless) image of this. Unlike The Science of Babies, it also acknowledges that birthing a baby can hurt and that the birthing parent may need rest afterwards—useful information for children encountering their parent after the birth of a sibling.
On the other hand, What Makes a Baby (which I love and highly recommend), gets somewhat whimsical and metaphorical on some pages as it shows anthropomorphic egg and sperm dancing and talking as they meet. The metaphor is valid, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with using it—but there may be some readers (and their adults) who prefer more realistic diagrams, in which case The Science of Babies may be more to their liking. Or get both books, as each covers some things the other doesn’t, and different books may resonate differently with different children at different times. (What Makes a Baby also doesn’t discuss sexual intercourse, saving that for the next book in its series, Sex Is a Funny Word, which is aimed at slightly older children.) And consider how lucky we are to have several books on the subject that (despite some limitations) are more inclusive than the ones we ourselves grew up with.
