Same-Sex Families in the Classroom
I was going to put this in my Weekly Political Update, but decided it deserved a post of its own:
Officials from the Lexington, Massachusetts school district asked a federal judge to dismiss the lawsuit of two couples who claim their parental rights were violated when books depicting same-sex families were discussed in their children’s elementary-school classrooms. The parents “want to be able to remove their young children from classrooms when homosexuality or gay marriage is being discussed.” A similar situation has arisen in New Jersey. As Queerty said, however:
When parents send their kids to - gulp - public school, they should really expect that the school will teach the state’s moral laws. For example, if you reside in a state in which gay marriage has been granted, i.e. Massachusetts, one should anticipate so-called gay issues coming up in the curriculum.
At some, if not many, points in my child’s education, the curriculum will contain something that contradicts a viewpoint I hold. The solution is not to ban it from being taught, but rather for me to be involved enough—with both the school and my son—that I can use the occasions as opportunities to teach him what I do believe. Wanting to ban something from the curriculum is an admission that I have little faith in my own teaching abilities and influence over my child.
What worries me about cases like this, too, is the ultra-right’s vague (or opportunistic) definition of what constitutes “discussion of homosexuality.” For some, it means discussion of sex (which is not what most of us, LGBT or straight, are asking for, outside of designated sex-education classes at the higher grades). For others, it extends to anything that “promotes the homosexual lifestyle.”
The curriculum is only part of the picture. Even if the syllabus does not officially include same-sex families, children of same-sex families may be in the classroom. Does the far-right want to ban my son from talking about playing baseball with his mommy and momma? Will they bar him from bringing in a rainbow flag for show-and-tell? What about a photo of his family with their arms around each other? What if he attended his moms’ wedding during summer vacation? Is that a forbidden essay topic, or is it allowed as long as he doesn’t read it in front of the class like all of the other children? The argument extends to the many children with opposite-sex parents who may nevertheless have LGBT relatives. Banning “discussion of homosexuality” ultimately means banning many children from talking freely about their families, making them feel censored and segregated, simply because some parents have no faith in their abilities to counteract classroom teachings at home.
Ideally, of course, though perhaps not realistically, I would hope that these parents change their minds about same-sex families so they don’t feel the need to counteract. We are a part of our society now, and society had better learn to deal with us rather than pretending we don’t exist. Kudos to the Lexington School District for arguing that teaching diversity is a “legitimate state interest.”
Filed under: Education, Parenting, Politics and Law
What this attack on the schools really is is a SLAPP, a Strategic Lawsuit Against Public Participation. The aim isn’t to win, it’s to scare schools out of ever mentioning us because if you do the far right will bleed your district’s funds in court.
It’s nice that it’s happening in Lexington, which is a very wealthy community. But I’m sure the message is getting out to the rest of our prop-2 1/2′d districts not to do anything to upset the wingnuts.
[...] As Scribe Grrrl points out at After Ellen, the scene is full of clichés and predictability. The mother’s fear is remarkably similar, however, to those of certain real parents in Massachusetts and New Jersey, who are up in arms about materials used to discuss LGBT families in the classroom. Coincidentally, too, the New Jersey Supreme Court ruled today that students who are harassed by others may sue the school district if it fails to take “reasonable steps” to stop the behavior. The decision stemmed from the case of a boy who was physically and verbally harassed for several years by classmates who thought he was gay. [...]
[...] I fear, however, that her hope for school inclusion will be hard to achieve. In the past two weeks alone, school districts in Massachusetts and New Jersey have come under fire for including same-sex families in their diversity curricula. The Different Dragon may manage to slip into school libraries, for it is less obviously a book about LGBT families than, say, Heather Has Two Mommies or Daddy, Papa and Me. I foresee, though, the same kind of outcry that surrounded And Tango Makes Three, the book about gay penguins, when children bring the book home to unsuspecting and close-minded parents. [...]
[...] This is a sound ruling that focuses on our country’s historical values and current realities. I’ll just add, as I’ve said before, that while it’s their prerogative if parents want their children excused from planned discussions of diversity and same-sex families, they’re not going to be able to zoom in and yank their children away every time my son mentions that he went to the park with his moms or brings in photos of our wedding for show and tell. It’s going to be harder and harder to compartmentalize discussion of same-sex families into neat, optional units of the curriculum. We’re not an abstraction; we’re part of the larger community, and our children are learning next to everyone else’s. Bookmark to: [...]
[...] The Evesham School District of Marlton, New Jersey, eliminated a diversity film from its curriculum in early February after some parents protested its inclusion of same-sex families. (Here’s my original post on the matter, and a follow up, plus an excursus on same-sex families in the classroom.) [...]
[...] discussions of same-sex families, however, the District Court judge missed the fact that, as I wrote in February when the case was first heard: The curriculum is only part of the picture. Even if the [...]