It was fetal ultrasound day for Shane and Quiara on the most recent The L Word: Generation Q. Let’s see what happened.
Spoilers ahead.
Many Hands Make Light Work
Early in the episode, Alice and Nat are reveling in having a third parent around the house, since Nat’s ex-spouse Gigi, now part of their throuple, has made the kids breakfast and color-coded the closet. Gigi then comes in to announce that she’s dropping Eli off at ballet (hurrah for gender atypical activities) and another mom is picking Olive up for soccer practice. “How did we even live without her this whole time?” Alice effuses. I admit, there have been days when a third set of adult hands around my house would have been useful, too—and we only have one kid. Later in the episode, however, we see some of the challenges of throupledom, as the trio try to sort of the rules about who can do what with whom and when. Still, they make a good case for some of the benefits.
Mud and Horses
Meanwhile, Shane is having lunch with Bette and Tina, and tells them that she and Quiara, her ex-but-reunited and pregnant wife, are going to hear the baby’s heartbeat today. This sets off the other two on a spiral of reminiscence. “I still remember hearing Angie’s first little heartbeat,” Bette kvells.
“Oh, my God, me, too,” Tina says. “It was like this little sign of this big life to come. It was so special.”
They go on like this for a few moments, sharing how they were both sobbing at the experience. Bette and Tina also recollect Tina’s apt simile—that the ultrasound sounded “like horses stampeding in mud.” Shane looks a little shell-shocked at the sheer emotion coming off of them.
The scene is a prime example of retconning, however, since as Riese at Autostraddle has pointed out, “Tina likely heard Angie’s heartbeat for the first time alone, as Bette was unaware of Tina’s pregnancy for its first 3-4 months…. and she was also not sobbing at the first doctor’s appointment she did attend with preggers Tina.”
Or was it? While I don’t at all question Riese’s knowledge of L Word facts (she launched Autostraddle itself on the strength of her original-series recaps), I know that we parents often look back at the early days of parenthood with rose-colored lenses, memories muddied by those sleep-deprived days. It’s entirely possible Tina and Bette are conflating incidents and misremembering the timing. (Okay, I actually do think this was a retcon rather than a subtle comment by the show’s writers on the hazy days of early parenthood; I’m just saying it could be made to fit, should one wish to do so.)
Tina then tells Bette she’ll come over later to pick up Angie for a trip to the museum. Bette reminds her to then drop her off at Jordi’s because “they’re gonna watch a movie.”
Shane, who was there when Angie and Jordi shared their first kiss, smirks. “You know what that means.”
“Hey. Don’t do that. Don’t freak her out,” Tina says. Bette covers her ears with her hands. “No, no, no, no.” Viewers will recall from last week that Tina is the one Angie’s been confiding in about Jordi. This scene confirms that it’s Bette who’s more uptight (some might just say cautious) about the possibility of Angie sleeping with someone, while Tina is the sympathetic confidante who knows they have to let Angie grow up. That’s actually not a bad balance to have between parents, though, as long as neither one takes her position to an extreme or steamrolls it over the other one.
A Womb With a View
Later on, we see Shane and Quiara in the exam room for Quiara’s ultrasound. Shane’s playing with one of those plastic anatomical models of a female reproductive system. It falls apart in her hands. “It’s okay, I’m nervous, too,” Quiara soothes.
“I’m not nervous, I’m just curious,” Shane insists. I’m not convinced.
The doctor comes in to do the procedure and is unphased when Quiara introduces Shane as her wife. Yay for inclusive medical professionals!
The doctor says she can give Quiara something for the nausea that she’s been feeling, but not for all the extra McFlurries Quiara’s been craving lately. Ha!
They all hear the sound on the monitor.
“Shane, that’s our baby,” Quiara says, teary-eyed.
Shane looks hesitant. “Yeah. You know, it sounds like horses stampeding through the mud,” she offers.
“Oh, it does sound like horses stampeding through the mud,” Quiara says dreamily.
Shane still looks hesitant about the whole parenting thing, as we know she was.
Later, she’s late for a dinner date with Quiara. “Today was really hard,” she admits. “I know you’re supposed to feel something when you hear your baby’s heartbeat for the first time. Right? I didn’t feel anything. And that just scares me, because I don’t want to fuck it up.”
Quiara doesn’t blink. Shane presses, “How am I supposed to fix this?
“There’s nothing to fix. Okay?” Quiara responds, before dropping the most true parenting wisdom of the show: “You’ll feel exactly what you’re supposed to feel on your own time.”
Yes indeedy. Don’t ever let anyone else tell you what you’re “supposed” to feel as a parent and when. Sometimes, a big swell of parental love is there from the start. Other times, it can take a while to acclimatize to having a new creature sharing our home. And even though we parents love our kids, it’s perfectly natural to feel exhausted and frustrated by them at times.
Quiara knows, too, that people’s feelings around parenthood may be in flux. Shane asks her, “Aren’t you scared just a little bit?” and she replies, “No. But I’ll let you know if that changes.”
Micah and his Mom
Micah’s mom comes to visit, and immediately goes to buy some edibles. That habit may make her seem hip—but her difficulty acknowledging Micah’s real gender identity is anything but. When she goes out to lunch with Micah and his boyfriend José, she starts showing José photos of Micah as a child, pre-transition, and talks about when “he was a little girl.”
“That little girl’s not here. You know that, Mom,” Micah informs her. “She’s gone.”
“I hate when you say that,” his mom replies.
“But she is, all right? That little girl’s dead,” Micah says, and leaves the restaurant. José goes after him and assures him, “I see you, the person in front of me, for exactly who he is.”
In a later scene, his mom apologizes, saying, “I am sorry about earlier. I’m trying my best.”
“It’s not good enough,” Micah tells her.
“Your dad was always so much better at all this than I am,” she says, and they both agree and wish he was still alive.
“I will do better. I promise,” she says. “I can do that for you.” She then affirms this by saying, “Have you told that sweet boy that you love him yet? ‘Cause he loves you, too. What you have with him is very real.”
That’s sweet—but I think she’d also benefit from finding a local PFLAG group, fast.
Moving On
Back at Bette’s house, Tina is saying how good it feels to see Angie more often. She tells Bette she’s started to look for a place in town. Tibette fans’ hopes rose ever so briefly before Tina reveals that her new partner, Carrie, has asked her to marry. Tina hadn’t told Bette before this because she wanted to discuss in person how to tell Angie.
Bette is flustered. “Any … any … any way you want,” she stutters.
Tina proposes the three of them telling Angie together. “I think that would be nice for Angie.”
“Yeah, Angie’s gonna be… She’s gonna be thrilled,” Bette manages.
It’s admirable that Tina’s first thought here is Angie’s well-being, even though we know that Tina and Bette split because of Tina’s affair. Still, one wonders how much thought Bette gave to Angie before she started her affair with a married woman.
That brings us to the attack ad that Bette’s opponent for mayor is running. It shows a picture of Bette, Tina, and Angie, with the voiceover: “Bette Porter wants you to believe her family is just like yours. We know better. She’s not afraid to sleep with your wife. Vote for real family values. Not Bette Porter.”
Ugh. Not that what Bette did was right—but to see one person’s actions being used to slander queer families in general is just awful (and the same could be said for when this type of thing happens to people of other marginalized identities, as it does).
Passing On
Sophie’s grandmother is in the hospital, and while this storyline mainly serves as a vehicle to accelerate her and Finley’s growing attraction, it nevertheless offers some truths about family members passing on. Sophie relates the story of when she was a child and her grandmother took her to Radio City Music Hall, then cut the line to get in. “If she dies, I’ll be the only one who knows that story,” she says. My parents both passed in recent years, and I could say the same about so many times with them. This was for me, the most poignant moment of the episode.
This Sunday night is the season ender—so soon! I’ll be back with a recap for that, of course, and looking forward to season 2.