Not All Queer Families May Fit the Census, But I’m Completing It Anyway

It’s Census time here in the U.S. and we’ll all be getting Census mailings over the next few weeks. While the questions have expanded since 2010 to be more inclusive of same-sex couples, though, they still don’t fully reflect LGBTQ identities or families. I’m forcing myself to complete it to the best of my ability, however. Here’s why you should do the same.

Census 2020

In completing the Census form, each household decides on one person at least 15 years old to be Person 1. Information about other members of the household is based on their relationship to Person 1. For Census 2020, those options are:

  • opposite-sex husband/wife/spouse;
  • opposite-sex unmarried partner;
  • same-sex husband/wife/spouse;
  • same-sex unmarried partner;
  • biological son or daughter;
  • adopted son or daughter;
  • stepson or stepdaughter;
  • brother or sister;
  • father or mother;
  • grandchild;
  • parent-in-law;
  • son-in-law or daughter-in-law;
  • other relative;
  • roommate or housemate;
  • foster child;
  • other nonrelative.

This is an improvement over Census 2010, which was the first to ask about same-sex married spouses but did not capture information about same-sex unmarried partners. Still, as the National LGBTQ Task Force points out in its “Guide to the 2020 Census (PDF)“:

Despite these changes, the responses still do not accurately represent or capture data on all people in our community, including bisexual people, transgender people, gender nonconforming and non-binary people, LGBTQ people who are not living with their spouse or unmarried partner, LGBTQ people who are not in relationships, asexual people, or intersex people. In fact, the responses to this question remain unnecessarily gendered, which the Task Force is also working to change.

Here’s another problem. Consider a same-sex couple who used one member’s egg and womb, plus donor sperm, to have their child. If the nonbiological parent hasn’t done a second-parent adoption (even though that’s still advised), they’d have no accurate way to fill out the form as Person 1, even if they’re on the kid’s birth certificate. Yes, their spouse/partner, the biological parent, could be Person 1 and find an answer that fits—but if they’re divorced/separated (or the other parent has died) and kid is living with the nonbio, non-adoptive parent, there’s no accurate answer. And ideally, any person over the required age of 15 should be equally able to complete the form as Person 1. If the nonbiological parent here had done a second-parent adoption, however, I still imagine social scientists and policy makers would want to distinguish between adoptions of kids in need of homes and second-parent adoptions within an existing family. The Census needs more options to split those out, maybe by adding, “Child via second-parent adoption or court order”?

My own family’s situation is slightly different. We used reciprocal IVF to start our family, using my egg and her womb. We got a court order, not a second-parent adoption, to make me a legal parent. If my spouse is Person 1, she could say that our son is her biological child, since he came out of her body, even though he isn’t genetically connected. (If her definition was biological = genetic, however, then she’d have no way to complete the form as Person 1.) If I was Person 1, though, I could also say he’s my biological child, because I’m genetically connected to him—which means we’ve just proven our son has two biological, cisgender moms. Cool—though perhaps not what the Census Bureau intended. Fact is, they’d never know, since in reality only one person per household completes the form—but it goes to show there are nuances of family relationships that the form just isn’t set up to catch. It would be nice if they clarified “biological (genetic or gestational),” if that’s what they mean, or split it out into two options if it isn’t. (And I’m not sure why the government would ever want to distinguish between gestational and genetic, but this seems an interesting bit of information for the social scientists. Personally, I’d like to know how many other families used RIVF and how this relates to various demographics.)

Other LGBTQ people may run into different problems completing the question. As the Task Force notes:

It is not uncommon for LGBTQ people to live in “complex households,” or households with multiple family members, families, friends, and other LGBTQ people. Again, the response options for this question do not accurately capture complex living situations. For example, for chosen family, it’s likely that “other nonrelative” is the category that best fits. However, it may not feel good to reduce such a relationship to that category.

They’re working with the Census Bureau on improvements for future surveys—but for the moment, they advise (my bold), “The most important thing to remember for now is that you should count everyone in your household, even if you do not have a close relationship to them.”

Why? The Task Force explains on its Queer the Census page:

[The federal government conducts the Census] so that they can allocate funds for programs like Medicaid, public housing, and food stamps, and so that they can make sure that our federal, state, and local elected officials are representing roughly the same number of people. Attorneys, advocates, activists, and service providers then use those data to press decision-makers for change, to show the needs of their communities, and to enforce our civil rights. For the Census to work—to direct funds to the right places and to help all of us access democracy—it has to count everyone in the country. Unfortunately, it doesn’t.

Every decade, the Census misses or undercounts hundreds of thousands of marginalized people, including low-income people, people of color, and very young children. At the same time, it over counts, or double counts, hundreds of thousands of people with the most privilege, including the white population, homeowners, and wealthy people.

Overcounts of privileged people and undercounts of marginalized people reinforce systems of power and oppression in this country.

That’s the heart of it: Completing the Census is an act of social justice. For more details, see the Task Force’s “Why the Census Matters for LGBTQ People (PDF),” which notes, too, that:

Though the Census does not explicitly ask about gender identity or sexual orientation, LGBTQ people exist within all the different populations that are undercounted and underserved. It is important for us to be counted in the 2020 Census to ensure that our communities have fair access to democracy and social services funding. We are part of this country and we need to be represented.

Yes, some of the answers may not reflect us as we want to be reflected. (This goes for racial and ethnic identities as well; see the Census Sibling Sites at the bottom of the Queer the Census page.) Nevertheless, simply being counted as a person can have a positive impact on our communities and selves. I encourage all LGBTQ people to complete the form in whatever way makes the most sense to you (even if it doesn’t make much). At the very least, it will give us something to do while we’re social distancing during the COVID-19 pandemic. Then stay tuned to the work of the Task Force and other organizations working to make Census 2030 (and other surveys from the Census Bureau) even more truly reflective of the people and families in the U.S.

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