More Than Half of LGBTQ+ Parents Surveyed Considered Leaving Florida Because of “Don’t Say Gay” Bill

More than half of the LGBTQ+ parents surveyed considered leaving Florida because of its so-called “Don’t Say Gay” bill, according to a new study, and the vast majority—nearly 90 percent—are worried about its effect on their children and family.

The study, “Impact of HB 1557 (Florida’s Don’t Say Gay Bill) on LGBTQ+ Parents in Florida,” was done by Dr. Abbie Goldberg of Clark University in collaboration with the Williams Institute of UCLA. It represents a first academic look at how the “Don’t Say Gay” bill, now law, is affecting LGBTQ-headed families in the state. The law, officially titled “Parental Rights in Education,” prohibits discussion of sexual orientation or gender identity in primary grades and restricts it to an undefined age-appropriateness in higher grades.

Goldberg is one of the leading researchers on LGBTQ families, and I have long respected her work. Her study is based on surveys of 113 LGBTQ+ parents, conducted between June 13 and September 9, 2022. (The bill went into effect on July 1, 2022.) Participants comprised “a broad representation of genders, sexual orientations, and geographic locales” although they were “disproportionately cisgender women, well-educated, and White or Latinx.”

The Impact

Here are some of the key takeaways:

  • 88 percent of the LGBTQ+ parents surveyed said they were very or somewhat worried about the effects of the bill on their children and families.
  • 56 percent have considered moving out of Florida because of the bill; 17 percent have taken steps to do so.
  • 21 percent have become less out in their communities.
  • Even those who were initially relatively unconcerned (e.g., because they believed the bill would not be signed into law or was unenforceable) became increasingly worried. Some considered moving their children to private schools.

Some parents said they first perceived a negative shift in climate even before the bill was passed. When asked about their children’s experiences in the three to six months before the survey—the period in which the bill was introduced:

  • LGBTQ+ parents worried the new law would restrict their children from speaking freely about their families, negatively impact their sense of legitimacy in a climate where their families were seen as “less than,” and encourage a hostile school climate.
  • LGBTQ+ parents with LGBTQ+ children “voiced intense concerns” about their children’s ability to talk freely about their own and their parents’/family’s identities; 13 percent said their children had expressed fears about the future related to living in Florida as LGBTQ+ youth.
  • The parents also worried about their own ability to be involved in/volunteer at their children’s schools.
  • The parents who were less concerned typically said that their children were younger (e.g., not yet in school) or were in private schools. Those who expressed the most concern typically had school-aged children in public schools.

As for the parents themselves, almost one-quarter feared harassment by neighbors because of their sexual orientation or gender identity or expression, and 21 percent had become less out in their neighborhood, workplace, or community. One parent shared (my bold):

It feels more and more hostile. I elected not to attend a local Pride family event this weekend due to an increase in protests and threats around the country. Feels like we’ve been ignored by both sides in the ‘Don’t Say Gay’ debate; focus has been on straight parents vs. LGBT adults or students, but not LGBT parents. Most arguments pose families/parents/children as being ‘opposite’, not part of, the LGBT community. I’m also fearful of new FL legislation that would target LGBT parents for abuse investigations/loss of custody based on bigoted beliefs that we are inherently sexual or a danger to kids just for being LGBT.

Coping

LGBTQ+ parents are resilient, however. They coped in a variety of ways, such as becoming more engaged in activism, avoiding the news, getting support from friends and family, and planning for the future (e.g., by saving money and exploring jobs and housing outside of Florida). Many felt conflicted, however, the study says—reluctant to leave families, friends, and communities; committed to caring for older family members or other dependents; or tied to jobs they could not find elsewhere.

Some participants talked about the law with their (usually school-aged) children, “with the goal of clarifying what the legislation says, what it doesn’t say, and why people are concerned.” Those with young children usually did not speak with them about the bill, “and/or kept the messaging simple and reassuring.” Those who did speak with young children “emphasized messages centering on ‘being yourself’ and ‘being proud of who you are’ presumably to counteract the negative messaging they might directly or indirectly be exposed to.”

The Big Picture

Overall, Goldberg writes, the findings highlight how “parents and children are impacted both directly and indirectly, in a variety of important ways” in places that are seeing a rise in legislation that tries to regulate “what can be said and taught in schools.” While some LGBTQ+ parents considered leaving the state or sending their children to private school to avoid the law’s direct impact, “Many LGBTQ+ parents do not have these options, and time will tell how they cope with and manage the stress associated with current and future legislation that aims to regulate discourse surrounding gender, sexual orientation, race, and families.”

And yes, future legislation is a looming threat. The ACLU is currently tracking 84 anti-LGBTQ bills related to schools and education. These bills are in states across the U.S.—and that doesn’t even take into account the many policies being debated at the local, school district level.

None of the results from this study are particularly surprising, although it is always good to have research to back what we may suspect. I also want to stress the part I bolded above. We LGBTQ parents have an important and perhaps unique role to play in the battles that continue to rage over education, censorship, and LGBTQ equality. We understand from experience both what it means to be a parent, concerned about our children, and what it means to be LGBTQ. Now more than ever, those of us who can be out, visible, and active without jeopardizing our safety or that of our children must make our voices heard.

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