Today is Gay Uncles Day—and gay (and other queer) uncles have been featured in children’s books since 1989! Here are more than two dozen of them (and a few for grown-ups), including some brand new ones, to help you celebrate these special people today and any day!
Let’s start by noting that in many of these books, the uncle’s/uncles’ sexuality is unknown. Yes, many are in same-sex relationships, but it’s unclear if they identify as gay, bisexual, or otherwise. There’s also one book below about a nonbinary person who uses the title “uncle” along with “they/them” pronouns (though other nonbinary people may choose blended titles like “auncle” and “untie”). I’m including these books as part of a general celebration of queer uncles, which seems to be how many folks are celebrating today’s holiday anyway.
Click images for full reviews, and enjoy them with your favorite uncle(s). Remember that you can filter my Database of LGBTQ Family Books at any time by the “Queer Uncles” tag to find these any any new titles.
Recent Middle Grade Books
Adorable but mischievous creatures help a queer, goth middle schooler reach out and grow. Two neighboring youth and their gay uncle play key roles.A fresh take on the magic-school trope, with a neurodiverse, Indian protagonist and her queer, chosen-family uncles.A totally original tale of mystery and mayhem centered on an eccentric family living in a sprawling, ancient manor house.The Swifts are back in the second volume of a delightful series about a large and eccentric family. This time, protagonist Shenanigan Swift is off to Paris, chasing a stolen painting.A neurodivergent girl learns to move through loss and trauma with the help of her uncle and his partner.
Recent Picture Books
This lyrical poem tells of a Black family’s traditions and milestones (including the wedding of two uncles) through the eyes of a young boy.Two brothers travel from the U.S. to celebrate their tíos’ (uncles’) wedding in Mexico.The Spanish edition of “Tío y tío: The Ring Bearers”A loving exploration of LGBTQ identities and families within indigenous (specifically Cree) culture. A boy who feels like an outsider at school gets some wise advice from his gay uncle in this rhyming tale.A young boy loves his Uncle Leo, an accountant, and his Auntie Lotta, a drag queen, who are both the same person. He helps his “Auntie Uncle” stay true to both identities. The revised edition of the sweet 2008 book about a girl worried that her favorite uncle will no longer have time for her after he marries his boyfriend. Violet is worried about speaking in front of a crowd at her school play. Her Nan and her (coupled) Uncles Tony and Sebastian offer ideas and support.A thoughtful book about gender-inclusive pronouns and the relationship between a nonbinary child and their nonbinary uncle.A child is staying with her two uncles while waiting for the birth of a new sibling, and learns the stories of her family through the objects woven into the dreadlocks of one uncle’s hair.This story from TikTok stars The Old Gays stars a young boy who needs a little advice from his four uncles to find the courage to be himself.A girl is excited about being the flower girl for her favorite uncle’s wedding to his boyfriend. The only problem is, Uncle Ash refuses to dance—and what’s a wedding without dancing?A boy has slightly mischievous adventures with his uncle, who isn’t explicitly gay, but has been seen as such by some reviewers, perhaps because he dances in a frilly apron while cooking, and has a penchant for shirts with wild prints.A boy learns what a wedding is all about as he helps his uncle and the uncle’s boyfriend prepare for theirs.
Older Picture Books
These older books (from the 1980s, 90s, and 2000s) may be of more historical interest than anything—several use dated, euphemistic terminology (such as “friend” for a partner)—but all show the love of queer uncles for their nieces and nephews, and vice versa.
The last four each focus on a child who has an uncle with HIV/AIDS or who has died from complications of AIDS. They thoughtfully address the topic despite some era-typical coyness about the uncles’ romantic relationships.
All of the books in this section can be read free online (click images for links), so you may still wish to check them out.
Mia’s resents the new man living with her favorite uncle—but only because it means she no longer has her uncle to herself. In the end, however, all find a happy resolution.In this older (1995) book, a girl named Elly observes her grandfather’s bias against her beloved Uncle Ned and Ned’s “friend,” Uncle Phil—but also sees the start of an attempt at acceptance.In this 1999 book, a girl helps her family and her Uncle Ron’s partner make an AIDS Quilt panel in honor of Ron, who died from complications of AIDS.A comforting but honest story from 1995 about a girl and her uncle who has AIDS.A boy reminisces about his uncle, who has died from complications of AIDS, in this 1994 book.In this first picture book about a person with AIDS, from 1989, Tim is not explicitly gay, but is unmarried and runs an antique store; it’s easy to assume he was imagined as a gay man.
Grown-Up Books
Fun fiction and wise advice!
Gay Uncle Patrick has always his niece and nephew. But when tragedy strikes the family and Patrick is suddenly the children’s primary guardian, he realizes a guncle’s approach of treats and jokes isn’t going to cut it anymore.Garner, the “proud guncle of 22 nieces and nephews,” offers tips and inspiration for any guncle.Aside from the title and author, there’s nothing particularly “gay” about this book, but Berk, who has 20 years of experience as a classroom teacher and preschool director, is full of good advice that many parents of all identities will find useful.
