Not He Or She, I’m Me

This simple, cheery book takes us through a day in the life of a nonbinary child as they wake up, get ready for school, play with friends, and go to bed. Each activity is briefly introduced, followed by an affirming sentence about the child’s identity,  e.g., “Lunch is all packed./Mom hugs me tight./Not he or she, I’m me,” or “All day at school./Books, blocks, and art,/not her, not him, I’m them.”

While there’s little dramatic tension in this slice-of-life story, it is an affirming depiction of a nonbinary child happy and comfortable with themself, loved by their (apparently single) mom, and with friends who seamlessly accept them. There’s no explanation of what it means to be nonbinary—we simply see it in action, so that even though this book focuses on the child’s nonbinary identity, it does so in a lovely, non-pedantic way.

The mixed-media illustrations are bright and dynamic like the protagonist.

Although I will always assert that not every book with an LGBTQ character needs to be “about” their LGBTQ identity, there’s still a place for ones that directly support and affirm those identities. This book does just that, giving us a picture of pure queer joy that should delight many readers—both nonbinary children and others who will simply appreciate the self-awareness and self-confidence shown here.

The child’s mom reads as Black; the child has lighter brown skin and could be read as Black or biracial. Their friends have a variety of skin tones/racial identities.

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