Memorial Day: Remembering the Fallen, Including Two Lesbian Moms

This Memorial Day, may we spare a thought for all who have given their lives in service to our country. Two lesbian moms are among them.

Army National Guard Staff Sergeant Donna Johnson was killed in Afghanistan in 2012 along with two other soldiers. Johnson, a member of the 514th Military Police Company, was one of the first same-sex spouses to die after the repeal of the military’s Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy. In that time before nationwide marriage equality, her wife, Army National Guard Staff Sgt. Tracy Johnson, had to fight for the survivor benefits accorded to a different-sex spouse, which were not granted until 2014.

In 2018, though, in a sign of change, the National Guard named a readiness center in her honor: the Staff Sgt. Donna Johnson Readiness Center, in Johnson’s hometown of Raeford, N.C. The Modern Military Association of America (MMAA), the nation’s largest organization of LGBTQ service members, military spouses, veterans, their families, and allies, also honors a service member each year with the Donna Johnson Equality and Valor Award. And in February 2021, they created the 2021 MMAA Military Spouse Donna Johnson Memorial Scholarship funded by Parsons. The first of the scholarships was awarded just weeks ago.

Air Force Major Adrianna Vorderbruggen, who served with the USAF Office of Special Investigations, was killed in Afghanistan in 2015, along with five other troops. She left behind a spouse, Heather Lamb, and their young son. Vorderbruggen had fought to repeal Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, and was one of the first servicemembers to wed a same-sex spouse once that had happened.

These are only two of the many other LGBTQ service members who gave their lives defending our country, and who often hid their queer identities in order to serve. We owe them—and all who have given their lives, regardless of sexual orientation and gender identity—a debt of gratitude, and we owe their surviving spouses, children, and other loved ones our pledge to work towards a world where no one ever need lose any loved one to armed conflict.